Revision Sample

User Essay:

Taking my own experience for example, I am a big fan of football, time difference. a heare of and I always watch futball match at night as a result The absence of sleep makes my physical condition worse, disease. lending

AI Revisions:


Comment:
AI performs Basic Revision that retains the main points from the original essay but enhances the clarity and conciseness of the writing. Some notable changes include:
  • Grammatical errors: Revised Version corrects grammatical errors found in the original essay.
  • Spelling mistakes
  • Punctuation issues: For example: Added a period after ‘football’ to separate it into its own sentence.
Furthermore, AI edits for style and clarity. The improvements can be seen in the following areas:
  • Sentence restructuring: Revised Version restructures sentences to improve readability and coherence. For example, Rephrased ‘The absence of sleep makes my physical condition worse, disease. lending’ to ‘However, the lack of sleep negatively affects my physical condition and can lead to health issues.’ for clarity and coherence.
  • Word choice: Change ‘the absence of’ to ‘the lack of’
Through the AI revised essay and suggestions, students can refine their writing skills and produce higher-quality written works.

Taking my own experience for example, I am a big fan of football, football. The time difference. difference is a heare of and challenge, as I always often have to stay up late to watch futball match at night as a result The absence football matches. However, the lack of sleep makes negatively affects my physical condition worse, disease. lendingand can lead to health issues.


Suggestion:
  • Added a period after ‘football’ to separate it into its own sentence.
  • Rephrased ‘time difference’ to ‘the time difference is a challenge’ for clarity.
  • Rephrased ‘a heare of’ to ‘as I often have to stay up late’ for better expression.
  • Rephrased ‘futball match’ to ‘football matches’ for correct spelling.
  • Added a comma after ‘night’ to improve punctuation.
  • Rephrased ‘The absence of sleep makes my physical condition worse, disease. lending’ to ‘However, the lack of sleep negatively affects my physical condition and can lead to health issues.’ for clarity and coherence.
修改建议:
  • 在’football’后面添加一个句号,将其分成独立的句子。
  • 将’time difference’改为’the time difference is a challenge’以增加清晰度。
  • 将’a heare of’改为’as I often have to stay up late’以更好地表达。
  • 将’futball match’改为’football matches’以修正拼写错误。
  • 在’night’后面添加一个逗号以改善标点符号。
  • 将’The absence of sleep makes my physical condition worse, disease. lending’改为’However, the lack of sleep negatively affects my physical condition and can lead to health issues.’以增加清晰度和连贯性。
Comment:
AI performs Content Enhancement that further improves the text in terms of editing for style and clarity, readability and coherence, overall content, organization, logical flow, and structure. Here’s a breakdown of how Content Enhancement imporves in these aspects:
  • Use of language: Enhanced Version employs more refined language choices, using terms like “poses a challenge” instead of “is a challenge” and “physical condition” instead of “physical well-being”
  • Precision and Clarity: Enhanced Version makes it more precise, using “can potentially lead to” instead of “can lead to”.
  • Enhanced Logical Flow: Enhanced Version demonstrates enhanced logical flow by reinforcing the cause-and-effect relationship. It uses “However” and “Unfortunately” for better flow and structure.
Enhanced Version goes beyond basic language mechanics and emphasizes the importance of clear and coherent writing. By restructuring sentences to improve readability and coherence, students learn how to effectively convey their ideas and ensure that their writing flows smoothly. This improves their overall communication skills and helps them engage readers more effectively. This also fosters their ability to create well-structured and engaging pieces of writing. By reading and thinking critically about the three versions of writing, students can gain a comprehensive understanding of how their skills have progressed and what areas require further improvement.
Your Input:
Taking my own experience for example, I am a big fan of football, time difference. a heare of and I always watch futball match at night as a result The absence of sleep makes my physical condition worse, disease. lending
Basic Revision:
Taking my own experience for example, I am a big fan of football. The time difference is a challenge, as I often have to stay up late to watch football matches. However, the lack of sleep negatively affects my physical condition and can lead to health issues.
Content Enhancement:
Drawing from my personal experience, I am an avid football fan. However, the time difference poses a challenge as I often find myself staying up late to watch football matches. Unfortunately, the lack of sleep takes a toll on my physical well-being and can potentially lead to various health issues.
Comment:
Translate Basic Revision and Content Enhancement to Chinese.
基本校对:
以我自己的经验为例,我是一个足球迷。时差是一个挑战,因为我经常不得不熬夜看足球比赛。然而,睡眠不足会对我的身体状况产生负面影响,并可能导致健康问题。
内容润色:
根据我的个人经验,我是一个狂热的足球迷。然而,时差带来了挑战,因为我经常熬夜看足球比赛。不幸的是,睡眠不足对我的身体健康产生了负面影响,并可能导致各种健康问题。

Summary:

In summary, both Basic Revision and Content Enhancement offer valuable feedback for students to improve their writing and English skills. Basic Revision focuses on the foundational aspects of language mechanics and word choice, while Content Enhancement emphasizes readability, coherence, content development, and narrative techniques. By incorporating the suggestions and improvements from both versions, students can enhance their writing abilities and develop a more effective and engaging written expression, benefiting their overall English language proficiency.